I’m just going to get to it: I’m breaking up with you. That fuzzy feeling you give me just isn’t doing it anymore.
I know this may come as a shock to you, but I’ve felt this way for a while and was just too scared to act on it. The truth is, I’ve finally found someone who will be there for me, who’s a lot nicer than I ever could’ve imagined, and most importantly, makes my teeth strong instead of weak: my new Tend dentist.
I’ll always remember our good times: eating candy at the movies, all the times I forgot to floss or brush and you stood by me, growing in the night. Because you thrive in the bacteria of an unbrushed mouth, it couldn't be helped. I’ll always cherish how hard we laughed about how gross my breath smelled that one morning. Or how your friends Tartar and Cavities kept overstaying their welcome.
But that’s the thing though, right? Our relationship was never just us. If it was just you and the other millions of friendly bacteria in my mouth, it would be one thing. But I’m slowly accepting that you and your buds are a package deal. And I deserve better than that.
I know you’ll come back to me. That’s only natural. But I feel compelled to warn you: my new Tend dentist will always be there to support me in getting rid of you again.
Maybe one day we can get to a point where we’re friends, where we can give each other heartfelt hello’s as I scrape you off my teeth at night. But for now, I’m going to make a clean break. I hope you understand.
Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because of all the candy we ate.
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